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do you remember that time when jesus christ puked all over the bar?

so, to take a break from my endless piles of reading and work and such, i decided to join chris and eric and some friends visiting from out of town at brewski's for a beer. not in my whole life would i have expected to see my very christ-like-looking roommate drunk out of his mind at the table... immobile even. might i remind you that i haven't ever seen my roommate drunk... tipsy, yes, but never drunk.

since i was the last to arrive at the bar and oh so very behind on my intake of alcohol, i guess that one could have called me the 'designated driver by default.' while pseudo-carrying jesus to my car, i realized just how short i really am: having to be the human walking stick for a nearly-seven-foot-tall man while i measure up at a measly 5'-3" was quite an eye-opening experience... though i will think of this as not that i am a midget but that jesus is just too damn tall.

[side note: i honestly don't understand what the big deal is about driving someone home when they aren't capable or just shouldn't do it themselves. no big deal... i mean, come on... dui's/car accidents aren't any fun for anyone involved... and in all seriousness, anyone who would just leave friends or even aquaintences in a drunken stupor to drive themselves home are, without a doubt, the lowest of the scum of the earth.]

i know that i have been most grateful when i have been the driven and not the driver, so i was happy to assist jesus on his journey home... my only question is, does this mean that i get to go to heaven? i mean, i did help jesus in a time of need and all...

2 comments:

honestyrain said...

hey. i thought i already posted to this? what the?

yes, you get into heaven automatically when you help jesus out of any scrape. good for you.

i once got absurdly drunk and had to be carted up to my apartment by someone i didn't know and who had no i dea if he was about to run into a boyfriend on the other side of my door. poor guy. he was a friend of a friend and the only sober person in our party and all i can say is thank god for him. i was a mess.

i think some day i will blog him a thank you ;)

natalie said...

it's a relief to know that i have a foot in the door of heaven... woo. i was once carted home by a friend of a friend... and i puked in his car... not so fun. the guy was really cool, though [but i'm still absurdly embarrassed about the whole thing...] and hasn't used it as ammunition against me [in that i-know-stories-about-you-so-i-can-make-fun-of-you kind of way].

you should definitely blog the guy a thank you...