this is why i will be leaving... and this is why i can't see you no more.

peaks and valleys, right? i seem to find myself in an ever-expanding valley of late. perhaps it's lack of sleep, perhaps i'm stir-crazy at the moment, perhaps i'm just sad. not really sure, don't really care. i do know that watching my close friends and my best friend battle the post-hurricane shit storm is breaking my heart just a little more each day... i don't know if it's possible to empathize oneself into a broken heart but the fact that i can't do anything to take the pain and the loss away, or even to ease it in the least kills me. like the my-heart-hurts-so-much-i-feel-like-i'm-going-to-die kind of 'it's killing me.' having to just sit idly by and watch the people i care about fall to pieces is a little too much to bear. the knowing that i am completely powerless to help other than to lend a shoulder to cry on, an ear to vent to... that's the part that's too much to bear.