effing right!

sox win! sox win! three cheers for the freaking white sox: hip hip hooray! hip hip hooray! hip hip hooray! i love my sox! my boys are all off and winning world series games and stuff... almost brings a joyful tear to my little eye...

and now... holding my breath until tomorrow night and back to CAD.

i don't know why i feel so tongue tied...

all work and no sleep makes natalie a very delirious girl... and what's more? it's sleeping weather [cold, cloudy... the kind that makes it even more difficult to peel myself out of my bed in the morning, yeah. that kind] - it's like it's taunting me... ha ha ha. you can't sleep. you want to so badly... but no. none for you. autoCAD for you. ha. ha. ha.

on another note - i honestly believe that some people just shouldn't be allowed to get tattoos. these people fit into one of the following categories: 1] the ones that walk into ye olde tattoo shoppe and walk directly to the wall covered in ye olde standard dumb-fuck tattoos and/or catalogue and pick out some random image that holds no personal meaning and often fits into the realm of the retarded and cheesy. 2] the ones that walk into said tattoo shoppe [yes, the extra 'p' and the 'e' are intentional... i do know how to spell shop... thank. you. very. much.] and proceed to be drunk and bitchy to the artist behind the counter while aforementioned artist is currently working on someone else's body art. gaffaw. 3] the ones that walk in and ask for 'a four-leaf clover that's unique' or some other analogous nonsense and then proceed to scurry over to the 'wall'. yeah, sweetheart. real unique. 4] the ones that walk into the 'shoppe' ten minutes before closing time and demand a tattoo.

hint: don't mess with and/or be rude, inconsiderate, condescending, patronizing, etc. to the people who do the following: a] serve you food. - spit and other things can be easily disguised as 'special' little additions to your favorite dish. yep. uh huh. they can. b] keep you from dying [doctors and such]. - there are some pretty scary diseases out there and if you get one, you'll want to have the knowledge that you haven't done anything to make said doctor-person wish you ill will. c] people who will be prodding your body with needles repeatedly to leave a very permanent image or hole. - you never want to hear 'oops,' 'aw shit,' 'well, maybe no one will notice' kind of things or sniggers from people in the tattoo shoppe. it normally doesn't forebode well...

it's just common sense... the people with the power and potential to punish you for not being descent, compassionate, considerate human beings should not be screwed with...

it's a new dawn. it's a new day... and i'm feeling good.

the world is about to go to sleep. the cold, crisp air blew in my bedroom window this morning and all i could do was sigh. i love winter... it seems as if all the world's potential is recollected and in waiting for the whole season. the air is cleaner, the light changes - surrounding everything in a cool, soft glow; all is more fresh. the ever-racing pace of the everyday seems to slow down for a breath - a deep, cleansing, satisfying breath. the sky seems more clear, even when it's cloudy outside... the night sky radiates a deep, velvetine indigo - a cold, quiet fiery blanket - and the world sleeps for a while... if the season could have a soundtrack, it should be filled with jazz... filling every space with sultry sounds of a rich and raspy voice, laced with hand-strummed guitar and an intoxicating, brushed beat. at rest and drinking it in...

i can't think for you anymore

my life has been a collection of busy nothings of late. my ipod is dead... woe is me. i think i got food poisoning from a really sketchy serving of buffalo wings on monday. had a critique on friday. slept all freaking day on saturday and then ate bbq and drank beer [as we actually had a weekend off for the first and last time all semester]... yeah. i'm really boring. i go to school in the morning, stay at school all day 'doing work' [i say 'doing work' because most of the time i'm so tired and/or frustrated that i just end up staring at my desk and 'doing nothing'], go home to eat dinner, work on the cnc mill and/or laser cutter, stay up all night 'doing work,' and repeat the whole miserable excuse for an existence ad nauseum. ok, i'm through whining, i promise...

ok, i'm going to 'do work' now... or something. over and out.

screw jimminy... my conscience needs a rest.

tired. really behind. been meaning to post. been lazy and haven't posted. would be sorry save for the whole lazy-thing. will post something of substance later tonight. have stories. must share. peace out. homie.

pain in my heart... just won't let me sleep

as i sit here, staring blankly at this computer screen, built to spill are probably playing their set at the dickson street theater... i should be there. i however, have the worst luck on the freaking planet [ok, maybe not the worst, but you get my drift.]. the bloody show sold out three people in front of me. i'm upset. truly, deeply upset. i know it's just a stupid show and whatnot, but they're one of my favorite bands... they play my favorite song... and i don't get to be there when they play it.

one could have bought tickets beforehand, but i'm poor and i didn't have the money to do so until it was too late. and then i get to the show more than an hour early and they sell out... and now i get to sit here and think about how i could be there... and it makes me sad... stupid, yes, i know... but sad nonetheless.

i thought my alarm clock made food...

so, at the moment, i am cursing myself for taking the job of being 'cnc and laser cutter operator' at the u of a, because i've spent the whole bloody weekend helping every other bleeding person in my freaking studio do their work and i've had no time to do my own. growl. yeah, punk, that's right, i said growl. do somethin'...

i got a new tattoo on friday night, 'small but tasteful' ... like my friend said, it's so much better than therapy... and so much cheaper than a shrink. i felt kind of bad, because it only took five minutes to actually do the tattoo and it took robbie more time to clean up afterwards... c'est la vie, i suppose.

as is to be expected, my life is otherwise sickeningly boring, because i am constantly at school or [less often] sleeping... but on tuesday, one of my favoritest bands ever - built to spill - is coming here... oh yes... and i will be up there for the concert, even if i have to sacrifice eating time on tuesday for it [because we have a crit with a guest critic on wednesday...].

advice to close - if you have to be up all night drawing or something of the sort - if you value your sanity and don't wish to have freakish scary nightmares - don't listen to pink floyd's the wall on repeat. just don't. the results aren't pretty... just trust me on this one.

'you put the art in retarded'

i saw a brief segment of a 'the bravery' concert this evening... courtesy of university programs and such - basically, just a break from my brain [much needed]. i was greatly amused... with some of the most 'creative' lyrics i think i've ever heard [see above title... pretty creative, huh?]. the music was actually not that bad and the performance was interesting, but 'you put the art in retarded' was just more than i could handle...

this is why i will be leaving... and this is why i can't see you no more.

peaks and valleys, right? i seem to find myself in an ever-expanding valley of late. perhaps it's lack of sleep, perhaps i'm stir-crazy at the moment, perhaps i'm just sad. not really sure, don't really care. i do know that watching my close friends and my best friend battle the post-hurricane shit storm is breaking my heart just a little more each day... i don't know if it's possible to empathize oneself into a broken heart but the fact that i can't do anything to take the pain and the loss away, or even to ease it in the least kills me. like the my-heart-hurts-so-much-i-feel-like-i'm-going-to-die kind of 'it's killing me.' having to just sit idly by and watch the people i care about fall to pieces is a little too much to bear. the knowing that i am completely powerless to help other than to lend a shoulder to cry on, an ear to vent to... that's the part that's too much to bear.

tiny suns infused with sour

cold has turned to cough has turned into some sort of nasty bronchial infection. what joy is mine. what joy is mine is that i get really good medicine to play with... no, rewind. i get really good medicine to take and x-acto blades to play with. i know, i know... don't take 'narcotic' cough syrup and play with potentially lethal objects, but my friends, common sense left this particular equation long, long ago.

so, just back from a quick site visit to marfa, texas. lovely little town in the middle of nowhere, texas. home of the chinati foundation - the large compound of permanent art installations started by donald judd... really wonderful stuff. saw the marfa lights... and accidentally ended up watching an absolutely beautiful lunar eclipse. went to ojinaga, mexico for dinner and tequila. went to the mcdonald's observatory to look at billions upon billions of stars and clusters and nebulae and the moon through gigantic telescopes... [but i'm a geek, so this kind of stuff is incredibly exciting to me]. went to big bend to draw in the blistering sun... got to see an amazing thunderstorm in the big bend basin... an enormous peek amid a very large valley; very dramatic, very beautiful. listened to ridiculous amounts of funk [as if there is such a thing] on the many drives through the desert...

we got to drive from fayetteville, ar to tulsa, ok at 3:30 in the morning in order to catch a 6 am flight. suck. yes, i'm a night owl... no, 3:30 isn't an incredibly strange time for me on a normal basis. however, 3:30am after two days of no sleep whatsoever... not cool. not cool at all. particularly when you plan to catch up on sleep on the short flights and people keep talking to you. again, not cool.

anywho... i have lots of photos and as soon as i can figure out how in the bloody hell to operate this stinking contraption that will let me share my pretty pictures with you, i will have some of them posted... for the time being, back to playing with sharp objects under the influence of something i can't remember the name of. cheers.